I was very confident girl in childhood but due to lack of good schools in my hometown i moved to a reputed university for further studies where i was supposed to stay in hostel.
I belong to a small place so my classmates started making fun of me,i had some language challenges also so i had to face problems….it started with my speaking problem and it kept going on .
They started making fun of my everything..start from dress sense to the way i look ..my confidence became very low…i started seeing myself from others point of view ..my self esteem went very low ..i was good at studies but because of this low self esteem i could not get good marks despite studying hard…
I always thought..i am good for nothing..i am a “lallu Panju” gal..
Everyone is better than me…i never thought good about myself..i started facing challanges in smallest things also..
Be it holding a needle or tie rubber band or shoe laces…i always thought i cant do..
I am a bloody loser..
This went on for years ..rather i actully completed my studies…i became frustated..i started getting more angry..
But then i got job and finally i got rid of my so called school n College friends…
I Never had guys as friends because i wasnt comfortable talking to them..my bullies were girls only..
When i moved into job then it was compulsion to talk to guys as at workplace you are supposed to work as team ..
So i became friends with guys plus i was not having any baggage from school n College so somehow i got real friends..n i was not motivated but i was not demotivated either… & Yes i was a new person ..
As i got friends i started expressing myself without having fear of judged ,bullied,made fun of …slowly i became a person i was not…
But that was not it…after some time i again met some set of people who tried to bully me …it surely felt bad but i was not shattered this time coz i had people who appreciated me,who.loved me for the way i am..
Still i dint know how to stop being a victim..but then a tough time came with me ..it was a family issue…i got a well deserved long break from job so during this free time i got a chance to look into myself..
I started staying at home ,i observed ..not only my classmates bullied me but also some so called relatives…
I realised people bully you coz you let that happen.you behave like a victim..then i started working on myself slowly…
It took months to change into a confident and strong person..but i did with lots of changes…
Today also i m not that strong but yes i wont let anyone bully me…i have that confidence now…
What i did,how did i overcome.i will write in my next article….